Missed the LIVE WNBA Draft on ESPN? Fear not!

My analysis of this draft that I did not watch one second of… is this: Suck it, Geno! Haha! That chick Maya Moore from UConn is going to the Lynx. Good. I don’t know what city they’re from, sorry. Hopefully that will make Geno’s team suck though. They are from the the city of Connecticut, I think. Now that they’ll suck, hopefully we can hear Geno whine even more, if that’s humanly possible. The only other person I’ve heard of in women’s basketball is that dude Britney Griner. I don’t even think he’s a senior, so there’s a solid chance he might stay in school at Baylor to beat people up for another year. No clue. I asked my boy Macaroni his thoughts on the draft, and he had this to say… “I just hope my Sacramento Monarchs get a good pick, let’s see where they are in the draft order. Here we go, round 1 (scans list) hmm, no Monarchs, must have traded away their first pick, let’s check round 2. Hmmm, not there either. Maybe they won the Championship last year and don’t get a pick in order to level the playing field. Let’s check the standings from last year. Here we go… Wait, what the deuce? This must be a mis-print, No Monarchs? Are you kidding me? When did this happen? Did they ever really have team? Did I imagine that? What the hell is going here? Ok, I have recovered from my traumatic realization that at some point in the last 15 years the WNBA got rid of the Monarchs. It honestly could have been after the first year and I would never have known…” Sucks, bro… looks like the Monarchs went all Montreal Expos on you. For all I know, they could be the Lynx… and you just got Maya Moore. Stoked.

-bp

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