The Tiger Woods Hot-Dog-Thrower is a Disgrace to Hecklers Everywhere

SAN MARTIN, Calif. (AP) — Tiger Woods was sure to make news at CordeValle in his first tournament in seven weeks. Only it wasn’t from any of his scores or any of his shots. It was from a hot dog.

Even when he returned to golf last year after a sex scandal, Woods heard only the occasional heckle from the crowd or saw a plane toting a saucy message on a banner. But as he stood over a putt on the seventh green toward the end of his final round in the Open, he heard a commotion from security and saw remnants of a hot dog being tossed in his direction.

“When I looked up, the hot dog was already in the air,” Woods said. “The bun was kind of disintegrating.”

He stood over an 18-foot birdie putt late in his round when a 31-year-old man, whose name wasn’t released, yelled out his name and tossed the hot dog in his direction. Woods backed off his birdie putt, then quickly resumed play. He missed the putt.

“Some guy just came running on the green, and he had a hot dog, and evidently … I don’t know how he tried to throw it, but I was kind of focusing on my putt when he started yelling,” said Woods, who didn’t seem bothered by it. “Next thing I know, he laid on the ground, and looked like he wanted to be arrested because he … put his hands behind his back and turned his head.”

Sgt. Jose Cardoza said the man was arrested for disturbing the peace and removed from the property. Because it was a misdemeanor, Cardoza said the man would not be taken to jail and his name not disclosed. Cardoza said only that he was from Santa Rosa.

“He was very cooperative,” Cardoza said. “They said, ‘Why did you do this?’ He just shook his head in guilt or remorse. He didn’t give a reason why he did it.”

Cardoza said the man claimed he wasn’t throwing the hot dog at Woods, rather tossing it in the air. He said the man acknowledged having a drink earlier in the day, but that the man was not drunk.

Your damn right he shook his head in guilt or remorse. He should be ashamed of himself for giving up like a chump. I dunno about you guys, but I got all fired up when I heard about this. Not because I want to see the game of golf disrespected or because I hate Tiger Woods, but because I thought the video would be hilarious. Well, I finally watched the video and it’s the dumbest, most anti-climatic piece-of-crap hot dog hurling video ever. I had incredible visions of some dude hurdling security guards, heismanning fans, and blasting Tiger in the face with a wienie while he was mid-drive. Nope. Just some clown on the putting green nowhere near Tiger that immediately laid down face first after an awful throw. I’m so disappointed. Worst heckler ever.

For the record, I was all ready to just blast this joker for being a 31-year-old loser that needs to grow up and start acting his age. Then I remembered that 2 years ago I got escorted out of Torrey Pines Golf Course with Mac, Lippy, Bing, and Whitey because we were hucking plastic beer bottles at cardboard trash cans from about 40 yards out. Apparently, that’s frowned upon in major golf tournaments. Don’t think I’ve forgotten what you did to me, Officer Rodriquez….I’ll never forget.


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